It’s not unusual for me to cry when I come.
I don’t mean just a verbal cry.
I mean I cry, tears running down my face.
I can sob.
When I was younger, I was embarrassed, and I was confused.
Emotion was so strong within me and I couldn’t understand the tears.
The man I was with was also embarrassed and confused.
Worse, yet, not interested in discussing emotion, his, mine or anyone’s.
I made fun of myself instead — trying to distract and deny.
The tears lessened but did not completely go away.
Now that man is gone.
Yet the tears remain.
I’ve tried other men.
Sometimes tears, sometimes not.
What is gone is my self-derision.
I’ve learned a lesson or two about tears, my tears.
One man taught me that some men find these kind of tears endearing and enticing because they always come with my ecstatic joy.
Another helped me learn that my tears are not cheap commodities which appear regardless of context.
My tears require my trust, my commitment, my heart which only appears within his respect, his connection, his offer of safe harbor, and his heart.
I’ve learned on my own that my tears have many flavors: great emotion, deep heart, and sometimes lonely regret that there is no witness or partner to the creation of my tears and their joyful release.
Whatever the context, I know I no longer hold back.
I cry not because I am broken.
I cry because I am so fully connected to the depths of me, water overflows from my heart and moistens the motion of my body in deep euphoric release.
Sacred Sexuality is Sacred Hot – that ability to entwine the sensual and the spiritual within relationship.
For more articles exploring the celestial and the intimate check out more articles in this section of my website: Sacred Sexuality.